DTS Is a Strange Thing After All

November 17, 2011

DTS is a strange thing after all. I can’t believe lecture phase is nearly over. WE have three weeks of lectures left, schoolies and outreach prep. I keep wondering, how? How did it go so fast? I feel so sad! I think more sad thought because I haven’t wasted time—it’s not a regrettable sadness. It’s more a disbelief sadness.

Like, how is it nearly over? sadness. Especially because I know how fast outreach will fly by and before we know it it will be time to leave these 7 beautiful people that I’ve grown to know and love so well and who knows when I will see any of them again?

I’ve changed so much since I’ve been here. I have grown so much, but I still desire more, and I think it’s in this that my heart cry has changed. At the beginning of DTS it was more of “God, I want to get to know you and understand your love.” But, now it’s changed to “God, I want others to know you, and understand your love. I want to be your hands and feet and to preach to a lost world that Jesus saves. I want to be a vessel of your love and life. I want to be useful, not useless, to you. I want to LOSE MYSELF in bringing you glory. I want our heart beats to align. Your thoughts to become my thoughts. I want your will to be done on this earth and I genuinely want to do all I can in order for that to happen.”

I understand now, Jesus, that living for myself is not enough and it’s not what you ever intended. I will never be satisfied if I’m not giving ALL I HAVE for you, for your kingdom work, for the reunion of you and your children.

I want a lost world saved, Jesus.

I want restoration between this world and You, their King.

Who will go, God?

I will.

Who will you send Jesus?

Send me.

“’Whom shall I send and who will go for Us?’ Then I said, ‘Here am I! Send me.’” Isaiah 6:8