The journey to Oz

November 2, 2011

Crazy weekend! We just participated in what YWAM Gold Coast deems “Oz Quest.” A four day epic journey to prepare us for outreach. We walked nearly 30 miles, ate limited portions of food, and slept very little. Not that I’m complaining or anythingJ I really enjoyed being outside for what seemed like the first time in AGES! It was nice, and it was a good team bonding experience. And the feast near the end was such a delightful treat, I felt like a princess.

The last night was hard though. We had just hiked to this covered/canopy area. You know, the kind of place you’d see in a park where they have birthday parties and such. So we get there and there is a cross and music playing. And it’s a night of surrender. We’re not allowed to talk. We’re supposed to right down all the areas of our lives that we hold to ourselves and our clenching—not wanting to hand them over to God.

What I’ve learned since coming to DTS is that I am and Idolater. Not in the clear sense of the word. I don’t worship other gods, I don’t bow down to rats, I enjoy a good cheeseburger.  However, I am guilty of loving my friends and family more than Jesus. Truthfully, they were what held me back from coming to Australia in the first place. I was called, then I was scared to leave them, so I decided to stay in America, but realized that when God says go…you go.

So on that Monday night, I let go. I don’t think I’ve cried so hard since being on DTS. I just came to the realization that by trying to hold onto control, I can’t do anything. I can’t do anything either way; that’s God’s job and I’m doing both of us a disservice by trying to think that by loving them enough or staying wherever they are, I’ll be able to protect them. In fact, if I did that, it would break God’s heart and it would not make my life nearly as cool as God wants to make it!

The next day, as I was just truly enjoying being outside and having some solid time with the Lord, He gave me a vision. A vision of something big. A lot bigger than myself. He gave me glimpse into my future; however I’m fairly sure that it was the distant future. Well, yeah. Pretty distant. Wanna glimpse of my glimpse? Well, you’ll just have to stay tuned into my life J